Welcome to my world!

My life's been crazy since my Daddy moved in with me immediately after my mother's death in October 2010. My one and only kiddo headed to college at Carolina at the end of August. So...I lived on my own, for the first time in my life, for a total of a blissful six weeks. Then, I started the parenting gig with my dad. He's a combination of a grouchy old man, a surly teenager and a temperamental toddler. Needless to say, I get very close to the brink of insanity sometimes. I get through life by finding the humor in difficult circumstances. And for some reason, I wind up in the weirdest situations. I couldn't make this stuff up. So I wind up having lots and lots crazy adventures which make great stories to share with my friends. Writing about my life is so therapeutic. My ramblings range from funny to sad to angry (full of cuss words) to sweet. While my focus is dealing with the trials and tribulations of being a parent to my Daddy, I have lots of random, totally unrelated posts. Whatever's on my mind. I love to make people laugh, and I'm happy to think my readers will get my strange sense of humor. And maybe, people who are in my situation will be encouraged. That's all I can hope for...

Monday, January 28, 2013

Rising to the Occasion

I'm not sure I can do it.  It's a fucking funeral.  Inevitable.  My uncle.  The Daddler's brother.  He drank himself out of a pancreas.  Years ago.  But managed to outlive three wives.  All of whom were at least 15 years older.  Mother always said he was looking for a mama.  Maybe I should call him Uncle Oedipus.  Or the Black Widower.  Because he managed to go through several sweet ladies' life's savings.  God.  Please.  If I get that desperate, I hope someone will put me out of my misery.  I have a feeling Kiddo, the ultimate pragmatist, will handle that.  I have a call in to the Vandy Department of Anatomy.  If I give my body to science, they'll cremate me - at no cost to my family.  In fact, I think my family will get a little cash out of the deal.  If that doesn't pan out, I'm going to ask Kiddo to throw me in the Mighty Mississipp.  Or my back yard.  Actually, now that I think of it, Lucy has dug several holes more than big enough to hold my corpulent corpse.  How convenient... 

Wow.  This is morbid.  I'll blame it on Uncle Oedipus.

And the fact that I'll wind up in the same room as the Emotional Vampire.  Have I mentioned that I detest her?  Abhor?  Hate?  Don't give a shit?  Wish I didn't.

It'll be ok.  It always is.

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