Welcome to my world!

My life's been crazy since my Daddy moved in with me immediately after my mother's death in October 2010. My one and only kiddo headed to college at Carolina at the end of August. So...I lived on my own, for the first time in my life, for a total of a blissful six weeks. Then, I started the parenting gig with my dad. He's a combination of a grouchy old man, a surly teenager and a temperamental toddler. Needless to say, I get very close to the brink of insanity sometimes. I get through life by finding the humor in difficult circumstances. And for some reason, I wind up in the weirdest situations. I couldn't make this stuff up. So I wind up having lots and lots crazy adventures which make great stories to share with my friends. Writing about my life is so therapeutic. My ramblings range from funny to sad to angry (full of cuss words) to sweet. While my focus is dealing with the trials and tribulations of being a parent to my Daddy, I have lots of random, totally unrelated posts. Whatever's on my mind. I love to make people laugh, and I'm happy to think my readers will get my strange sense of humor. And maybe, people who are in my situation will be encouraged. That's all I can hope for...

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Justifiable Felinicide

The Bulimic Cat is killing me.  So if I killed her first, wouldn't that make it self defense?  She had a major binge/purge spell last week.  A few years ago, she threw up on me during the night.  Ever since, if I hear her retching, I sit bolt upright.  If she's on my bed, I push her off.  Once I hear her yack, I turn over and go back to sleep, knowing I'll have a pleasant little chore to tend to in the morning.

She woke me up this way, not once, but twice one night recently.  The doorknob to my Enchanted Aerie doesn't catch.  So I took to barricading my bedroom door.  If I'd ever remember to buy one of those wedge shaped doorstops, I wouldn't have a problem.  But I never think of it until I'm going to bed.

So I put heavy things against the door.  And it's amazing how much weight BC can move with her little battering ram of a head.  The other night, she got past the vacuum cleaner.  One night, I moved a bookcase in front of the door.  That was a little extreme, but it stopped her.  Right now, I have two cable boxes shoved against the door.  They're pretty heavy.  Three times, she's started her head-butting, and three times, I've jumped out of bed to push the door closed before she got it open enough to squeeze through. 

And now I have to pee.  That's why I don't use the bookcase any more.  The problem, though, is that when I go to the bathroom, I can't close the door behind me and she can sneak in.  More than once, I've come back to the EA, barricaded the door, settled into bed with a nice, empty bladder, and felt that familiar bounce of BC jumping onto my bed.  Fuck.  So frustrating.

So here I sit.  At 2 a.m.  Wide awake.  Needing to pee.  And hating that evil cat...

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