Welcome to my world!

My life's been crazy since my Daddy moved in with me immediately after my mother's death in October 2010. My one and only kiddo headed to college at Carolina at the end of August. So...I lived on my own, for the first time in my life, for a total of a blissful six weeks. Then, I started the parenting gig with my dad. He's a combination of a grouchy old man, a surly teenager and a temperamental toddler. Needless to say, I get very close to the brink of insanity sometimes. I get through life by finding the humor in difficult circumstances. And for some reason, I wind up in the weirdest situations. I couldn't make this stuff up. So I wind up having lots and lots crazy adventures which make great stories to share with my friends. Writing about my life is so therapeutic. My ramblings range from funny to sad to angry (full of cuss words) to sweet. While my focus is dealing with the trials and tribulations of being a parent to my Daddy, I have lots of random, totally unrelated posts. Whatever's on my mind. I love to make people laugh, and I'm happy to think my readers will get my strange sense of humor. And maybe, people who are in my situation will be encouraged. That's all I can hope for...

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Snatched from the Jaws of Death

I was ready to sentence the fuckin' cat to capital punishment today. Lethal injection. Don't be too hard on me. I'd pay the $65 the vet charges rather than take her our city's hell-hole of an animal shelter (contradiction in terms - Google our Memphis facility if you need a reason to join PETA). But on the bright side, I hear they employ mostly felons who are starting over. And they get the great fringe of supplementing their meager wages with proceeds from the sale of stray pit bulls to miscreants who need a steady supply of that commodity.

Wow, that whole paragraph must be confusing. Maybe I shouldn't tell you that the only thing that stopped me from toting that little feline bitch to her death was that the pet carrier is in the attic of my rental house. If she didn't get so nervous in the car that she pees whenever we go to the vet, I'd probably have thrown her in the backseat, sans carrier. You cannot get rid of the odor of cat urine. See many posts re stinky chair. Also, I knew I'd regret it tomorrow. Or at least feel guilty.

Gotta get some sleep tonight so I'll be normal tomorrow.

But first, I'm gonna compose another blog post about the son of a bitch I dealt with today. Luckily for him, I was too stunned to react - he was beyond the pale, even for a wet-behind-the-ears salesman. I have a feeling he won't have a perfect day tomorrow...

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